hotmessmomma learns humility - part deux - the library

So, when you make that leap from one child to two, you suddenly realize what bliss your life was with just one. Things automatically take much longer with two. For instance, there is no "let's just get out of the car and do this one quick thing". Oh, no, that is a dream no longer realized. No where is this more apparent to me than the library. Let's say that you just want to return a book and check a couple more out. You think to yourself, "I don't need the double stroller. I am running in. I can carry the infant and let the toddler walk". That's the first problem. Inevitably, the toddler finds a corner to squat and poo into her diaper, thus stinking up that section of the library. In addition, the infant will start pulling books off the shelves. The toddler will notice the fun game that has been created and will join in. Madly, you look at the check out line--it's 6 people deep. What's this newfangled gadget? A self-checkout machine? "I can handle that" you say to yourself. However, you must put down the infant and let go of the toddler's hand. Inevitably, the machine is from the devil, so it takes a while to figure it out. Meanwhile, the toddler and infant have begun a "get on your hands and knees and screech and laugh while chasing each other" game. The librarians are giving you stern looks and you hastily gather up your books and babies. Just as you think you are home free, you are stopped by a librarian asking you if you put the tabs on your books that you checked out. You think "what the h*ll is he talking about?" He gives you a look like "another idiot". It's not my fault, I mean, I think the DEVIL created that checkout machine! Regardless, he must re-check out your books, and you must let go of the toddler's hand once more. As you finish up, you scan the doorway looking for her. You get a little worried when you don't see her at first, then you lay eyes on her in the corner. She is sitting on a thick velvet rope held fast between two metal posts (akin to what is used to demarcate a line at a theater). And then she says "Look momma! A swing! I swing on swing!". And you say "Yes, baby. It's a swing. Let's go". And you leave. Quickly. And make a mental note to never return to this particular branch again.