Well friends, I hope that you are all doing well. I hope you haven't pined for my words of wisdom too much! (*wink,wink*) More like, words of pity, self-indulgence, and sarcasm! But before I indulge in self-loathing, I must say that I have missed blogging. It is so cathartic, like a semi-personal diary. Everything I write is a caricature of my real life--poking fun at the crazy situations I seem to find myself into.
Things have been very busy. Christmas was really wonderful and the break was much needed for everyone. It was good to see all the fam--my brother-in-law and sister-in-law to be flew in from DC, so it was awesome to see them.
We saw the Salters over MLK Jr. weekend. They are amazing friends, and I can't believe how much we, as adults, have "grown up" since meeting in the summer of '07. We have each had a kid, and we both find that it is hard to find that "chill time" we enjoyed in H-town.
Elisa turned 4 on the 11th, and we just had her party this past weekend. It was princess-themed and uber girly. She is beginning to write individual letters and she fascinates me every day.
Work is okay, and my kids are just growing before my eyes! I am learning how hard it is to "break into" a small town. Somedays it feels like I am just too different to ever win anyone's friendship or respect. I love my job and I am learning so much every day about how difficult it is to come into a position of leadership as a newcomer to a town and organization. Just because you have "book learning" doesn't mean people have to like you. Some days, I just feel like giving up and quitting and hiding at home. I should not feel so much anxiety at work that I can't just leave it there. The anxiety monster does not belong in my home. I have too much at stake to let fear and worry eat away at my heart.
On the other hand, I really enjoy my position and its challenges. I want to be a more professional and quality employee. I want to represent that woman that balances a career and caring for her family in the best and most positive way I know how. Like you have heard me say many times before, I want to be a career gal and a mom and part-time work suits me so well. I feel blessed to be where I am. My children are so happy and I am gaining so much experience. If I could just gain some confidence and butt all the peripheral things out of my head, things would be better. That will be the focus of my prayers this week....
Of course, I could just trade in my children for some serious moolah and work full-time...that could work, right? :) But you know what, I see my girls do things like sweetly share an ICEE completely umprompted, and then my son rushes to cuddle with me every day when I pick him up and I think "Maybe I'll keep 'em". The juggling act that is my life continues.....
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